the less things change....

you know the rest. i feel like that larry h. parker commercial. anyhow, i feel like its time for a change....life has been kinda ho hum lately. i want to go out and do something fun alone. now, what makes me so scared to do these things??? movies, concerts, road trips......ok i'm kinda scared to do a solo road trip since i know nothing about cars. i love to travel and have no money to travel with so i guess i'm not doing that. i wanna go to a concert, a good one with a band i've never heard of. i wanna hear some good music, i wanna see some good movies......where do i begin?

here i always thought i was the most confident person and always knew what i wanted and somehow i have this insecurity that has emerged and i don't want it anymore. i'm planning on going to the movies by myself on friday. yeah i guess i can take brian if he really wanted to go but i think i need to try it alone.

i guess i've been with brian so long i've forgotten what it's like to do things without my companion (sure sometimes doesn't like my taste in film, but oh well he goes anyway). Or maybe i've forgotten what it feels like to be independent. i mean don't get me wrong, i love to be married and i love my husband but somewhere in there i feel like i've lost a bit of me and i want it back.

I'm starting this friday, alone......and then i'll rush right home to cuddle :)



i'm not gonna lie, i'm nervous